Body Positivity

I was looking at two things on instagram. One was a quote from project heal. It said something like, “Make wings out of the things that broke you and rise above the people who hurt you.” This makes we want to draw wings out of the things that hurt me and draw myself flying over the people hurt me. I don’t care anymore what my pictures looks like. I don’t care if it looks like a famous artist drew it or if a toddler drew it. I just want to draw it. Thinking about how much I don’t care makes me excited to draw it. Not just because it won’t lead to self-hate and be exhausting, but because I know for a fact that just because I know I won’t care what it looks like, I know I’ll think it looks good. Plus it will also mean something and be very personal so I’m pretty excited about it too. But mainly, the fact that I don’t care what the end product looks like, makes me excited to just LOOK at the end product. The other thing was someone on instagram who just said something like embracing what your body can do, with a video of her doing yoga. It reminded me that there are so many beautiful things our bodies are used for besides being “thin.” And not just that, but the broken road we walk to make them thin, takes away all the other beauty we can have from our bodies. We can be thin but have no energy to dance. They would just be thin, and thin only. But, if we are kind to our bodies and treat them healthily I can do yoga, and be able to bend my body in beautiful ways, I can dance in move in beautiful ways, I can do WHATEVER I want with my body. Eating disorders take away a freedom we have with our bodies because of the damage we do that causes us physically not being able to do certain things. When I first got to treatment last year I wasn’t even allowed to do minor yoga in yoga group because of how I messed up my body. One place I went to in treatment made us walk around with see-through robes on with nothing underneath every morning in front of everyone. I didn’t want to walk around basically without clothes on but I had to. I know they had a good reason for it but that wasn’t what I wanted to do with my body, but that control was taken from me, because of my eating disorder. I used to try to change by the weight room door so I wouldn’t have to go far or change in the stall and walk as fast as I could to the weight room before someone got in line before me, but it never made it completely better. The eating disorder causes horrible things and takes away so many beautiful things.

Advertisements

2 thoughts on “Body Positivity

  1. “It reminded me that there are so many beautiful things our bodies are used for besides being β€œthin.” And not just that, but the broken road we walk to make them thin, takes away all the other beauty we can have from our bodies. We can be thin but have no energy to dance. They would just be thin, and thin only.”

    You hit the nail on the head with this! I have been recovered for some years now. Not a whole lot. But I am. However, I am paying the piper so to say. When I was consumed by my eating disorder it was just that; my eating disorder. There was no enjoyment in anything because all I wanted was to be “thin and thinner”. I could not do anything because of that. And at times I still cannot.

    I am so glad those items you spoke of inspire you! Get out of that eating disorder before you are not able to enjoy the things you would love to do. You deserve a full, happy life to live. Go out there and get it!!! πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ahhhhhhh thank you! πŸ™‚ I never realized this until recently when I started yoga. Unfortunately when things got bad again I have stopped and am probably not allowed to start again until I’m healthier but it is defiantly a reason to get healither! My therpist has been telling me every session since I started that I need other things in my life and it never really hit me until two weeks ago! That there really are other things worth it more than the stupid eating disorder!!!!!!

      Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s