Girl walks into a bakery…

She didn’t get too excited when she got the job. She only liked it because it was a job and it was at night so her puppy would be with someone while she was gone and that he would be asleep when she was gone, and she would be home when he was awake. During her training she wanted to cry with back pain and was afraid of the food around her because she has a stupid eating disorder. Then she got used to it but still feared the food just sitting around her even without eating it, and she made bakery items and didn’t have fun. BUT THENNNNN she started to make things in a different way. Instead of just frying them, she began to mold them into shapes and got excited to see how they would look, and if they looked bad, she didn’t freak out, she got excited to try again. Today, college made her do a report on Linkedin and she made her account and realized that she doesn’t have much volunteer opportunity since her eating disorder started so she googled some opportunities to do and realized how recovered she really is. Ok, I’m going to start saying I instead of she now because this is getting ridiculous. Anyway, I was looking at some volunteer things and I wanted something to take my dog to (Once I’m done with treatment that is) and I found therapy dogs. Now, my dog is completely insane and when he sees my elderly grandpa downstairs (since he lives with me and my mom) he runs around him in a circle and steals his sock off his foot an sits down like a toddler when I try to pick him up at the stairs and carry him away. He is nowhere near ready for that, but when we did dog training they talked about therapy dogs and I was so closed minded then, only thinking of the eating disorder, it didn’t excite me, and now I can see how exciting it is to be able to do that once my dog calms down. And as I wrote that I realized that, the eating disorder does not have an open mind. Opportunities are endless with an open mind, and when we have our eating disorder and not willing to recover, we see the joy in nothing else at all. I found other opportunities that I will not have time to do when I go to treatment but it  gives me more motivation to get out as fast as I can. These things I found are library helper (because the library is a peaceful place for me), playing elderly chair volleyball (I mean, who doesn’t want to do that!?), I found taking pictures of rescue dogs in order to get them adopted (I already signed up for that one obviously), and reading to an elder in hospice for 45 minutes a week. Recovery, even though I only have a small glimpse of you, you’re pretty amazing. I wonder how amazing you will be when I see more and more of you. Today after finding these opportunities I jumped around the house and said the words, “Bailey just because mommy is super excited doesn’t mean you have to go completely insane again!”


6 thoughts on “Girl walks into a bakery…

  1. “Bailey just because mommy is super excited doesn’t mean you have to go completely insane again!”

    Cute the way doggies share in our excitement! 🙂 We had dog who would get so goofy she would run from one end of the house to the other on both floors. It must be a dog thang!

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Thank you! I love reading yours, too. You are so open and candid about how you feel. I find that to be encouraging as sometimes I do not always like to share stuff. So, yeah!

        Liked by 1 person

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