I am graduating soon from college. I do not like my major whatsoever. I had so many plans when I was younger. I wanted to be a marine biologist but I don’t live around the ocean where I wanted to study, and I was too afraid to live far away from where I am from due to homesickness. I have a major I chose out of depression and it’s hard to be positive about my life, but I have been able to find the beauty in each path I might take. I might go back to school and pay for it by myself. Not only will I be doing what I love, but I will feel so much more accomplished paying for it myself. I love my minor of environmental studies so I have that possibility. But I also might get a job in the field of my major that I do not like. I might not live in a pretty place out of my home state surrounded by mountains and trees, or I might. I might not make a lot of money and have to live in an unsafe place. So here are all the possibilities of how my life, no matter what, can be a joyous occasion.
Getting a job with my major I don’t like: In this job it is very likely I will be in a cubicle surrounded by people. Watching the show the office makes me excited for this even though I don’t like my major. I know it might not be as fun as the show but it makes me excited and it makes me think about a lot of connection with people. When I drive to the shelter Wednesday mornings I pass a building with a lot of cubicles. I try to picture my life there and I’m okay with it. I don’t look at those cubicles and see a field I don’t enjoy. I see desks close together.
Living in a place that isn’t surrounded by nature: If I end up staying where I am, surrounded by houses instead of mountains and trees, it shows strength. I will have to work to get to a place like that. Sometimes I feel depressed when not around nature, so not living around nature means a strength for me. I have a way for every type of living situation to be beautiful to me but i’ll make a post about that at another time.
If you aren’t where you want to be, channel your depression and prove to yourself that you are strong enough to handle disappointment. The more struggles you face towards your dreams, the more meaningful the destination is. If your brain tells you that you didn’t struggle enough to get to your dreams, just tell that brain of yours, “Then I’ll dream again.” And dream some more and fight to get there.